2/15/15
“Well, Jimmy. These financials look great.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“When you asked me to give you a chance at managing the snack bar instead of shutting it down I had my doubts since you’re so young. But now I admit I was wrong. You’ve turned the place around.”
“It wasn’t hard. It was just a matter of cutting costs.”
“Well, yes. That’s important to turning a profit. But it’s not usually easy.”
“What I did was study the cash flow. I saw we had a good income stream, but it was being eaten up by our perishable purchases. The biggest outflow was to the meat vendor.”
“Yes, I know. But that’s the way it’s always been.”
“So I went out and found a cheaper supplier.”
“You found a place that sells ground beef even lower than what we were getting?”
“Yes and no. It’s cheaper; a lot cheaper. But it isn’t actually beef.”
“It isn’t beef? But that’s what hamburgers are!”
“Not necessarily. Think about it. They aren’t ‘ham’ either. And they aren’t ‘boogers.’ So the name doesn’t really mean anything.”
“But we advertise that we use ground beef.”
“Not anymore. If you look carefully at the menu board, you’ll see I’ve covered over the part that said, ‘100% fresh ground beef.’ It now only says ‘hamburger sandwich.’”
“So then what are you …? I’m almost afraid to ask. Uh, what kind of meat are you using?”
“I have a cousin who works at the animal shelter in the euthanasia room. And I have another cousin who has this old butcher’s meat grinder.”
“I’m going to be sick.”
“We’ve been saving loads of money for months!”
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