1/8/15
Gray-B-Gone
“A Customer Service Call”
“Hello, I’m –. Hello, Denise. Oh, Dennis. Sorry, Den-nis-suh. Yes, I’m call–, what? Thank you. I’m calling about one of your products. I’d like to get a refund, please.
“Yes, I tried returning it to the store but they said I had to call this number. It’s your Gray-B-Gone hair treatment. It didn’t do what I expected it to do.
“No, no it didn’t. When it said it would get rid of the gray, I had something else in mind. You see, I thought it was a hair dye that would color the gray hair dark again. But instead what it did was make the gray hair fall out!
“Well, yeah, the gray is gone. But all the gray hairs are gone completely. What little hair is left now looks very thin. Apparently not many still had color.
“No, look. It’s not what I wanted. I’m not completely satisfied. And the box said I could get a refund if I wasn’t completely satisfied with the results. So what do I have to do?
“Yes, I have the receipt. What? The box too? And the empty bottle? OK, I think I still have them. What’s that? You need what?! The hair? The hair that fell out? Why do you need that?
“But it washed away. Oh, hmm. Well, maybe there’s still some in the drain I can pick out. Then what?
“The back of the box? Yeah, I see it. What, that small writing? I see several numbers and a bunch of letters, but I can’t read them. It doesn’t look like English. The only word I can make out is Malaysia. That’s the address? OK, so I box all this up and mail it to that address? Then what?
“Twelve weeks?! Why does it take so long? Do what? You deduct for postage and handling? How much? How much?! But that’s nearly the amount of the refund. By the time I add in what it’ll cost to send all this stuff half-way around the world, it would cost me more than I’d get back! What kind of customer service is this? Let’s just forget it. Okay?
“Yeah,
yeah. You have a nice day too. Good bye.”
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